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If You Score Below 60%, You're Too Pure for This World

Welcome to a quiz that doesn't pull any punches — literally. If you score below 60% (that's 24 out of 40), congratulations: you're officially too pure for this world. This test is all about dark humor — the kind that makes you laugh while quietly questioning your soul. We've taken 40 of the most popular, mainstream dark jokes circulating on the internet and turned them into multiple-choice completions. Each question gives you a setup or the start of a twisted joke. Pick the correct punchline from four options. One point per correct answer. Dark humor isn't for the faint-hearted; it finds comedy in death, misfortune, bad decisions, and life's cruel ironies. But if you get most of them right, you might just belong in the shadows with the rest of us. Ready to test how twisted your sense of humor really is? Let's dive in.
1 /40

How is sex like air?

2 /40

How does an apple a day keep the doctor away?

3 /40

What was the convicted murderer's last request before the electric chair?

4 /40

Why don't orphans play baseball?

5 /40

My doctor told me I only have six months to live…

6 /40

My parents raised me as an only child...

7 /40

I named my dog "Five Miles"...

8 /40

I was at the bank making a deposit and the woman next to me asked if she could check her balance...

9 /40

I have a fear of speed bumps...

10 /40

I've dedicated my life to finding my wife's murderer…

11 /40

My husband left a note on the fridge that said, "This isn't working."

12 /40

I threw a boomerang a few years ago.

13 /40

Why do cemeteries have low fences?

14 /40

Did you hear about the guy who got his left side chopped off?

15 /40

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?

16 /40

I have a stepladder...

17 /40

My doctor told me I only have one year to live...

18 /40

Why was the cemetery so crowded?

19 /40

I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes...

20 /40

My grandfather has the heart of a lion…

21 /40

I have a joke about suicide, but…

22 /40

Why don't skeletons ever fight each other?

23 /40

What's the difference between me and cancer?

24 /40

I'll never forget my Grandfather's last words to me just before he died.

25 /40

When I see lovers' names engraved on a tree, I don't think it's cute or romantic...

26 /40

I told my therapist I was having suicidal thoughts.

27 /40

Where do "I'm sorry" and "I apologize" NOT mean the same thing?

28 /40

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?

29 /40

How is dark humor like food?

30 /40

What do you call an inexpensive circumcision?

31 /40

Why did the man put his money in the blender?

32 /40

I asked my dad if I was adopted. He laughed and said...

33 /40

Why shouldn't you mix alcohol and calculus?

34 /40

My mom died because we couldn't remember her blood type. As she was dying, she kept telling us to...

35 /40

Son: "Dad, if I told you I was gay, would you still love me?" Dad:

36 /40

I just got my doctor's test results, and I'm really upset about it...

37 /40

What's red and bad for your teeth?

38 /40

Where did Michael go after the explosion?

39 /40

They laughed at my crayon drawing...

40 /40

Why are cigarettes good for the environment?